I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones. I got myself kicked out of Catholic school in the 3rd grade (ask me how). Same time my mom converted to Buddhism. I was forced to confront the God/No God question at the age of 7 with a lot of support from people who were also letting go of God.

I railed at God from maybe age 10 to age 15 or so. You know, cursing at churches. Beefing with Bible thumpers. 'Corrupting' good Christian girls. I was angry at having my paradigm shifted, even though I thought the whole deal was BS in the first grade. 'What do you mean God doesn't have a mom?'

I suspect that this grief and anger at/with/about God happens to a lot of people when they initially let go of the "Big white guy in the sky" ideology. I was fortunate enough to tackle it at a young age in a supportive community of 1980ies new agers. (Tina Turner in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome Era)

My cosmological view these days consist of the idea of a biological being of which we, the planet, the stars, etc is a part of much like cells in a body. For communications sake, I called giant entity: My self.

As an empiricist I form theories based on my premise that we (all 'creation') are 'God'. I act accordingly and watch for results. I keep what makes me happy and discard the rest.

One of my chief theories (subject to change) is that reality changes to suit my purposes.